I've flirted with the idea of an older man (see: Dr. Dynamite), but at 18 years my senior, AND after my mother said he could be in her dating pool, those fantasies immediately evaporated. But over the last month, largely due to Mr. Day 19 (see: Four Seasons)...I noticed something pretty attractive in older men: They know what they want. No filter, no games, and no fear of commitment. I think I'm on to something...
But in most cases, an older man equals a divorce plus at least one child and that child's mother. With Mr. Day 19, it meant two divorces and two children with two different mothers, and was borderline two damn much. But, I saw the potential for the large family I've always wanted. If I could, I'd have three boys and a girl...but as I get older that baby making plan is slowly decreasing. Only children are lonely children, so now, I pray I can squeeze out a two piece. But with a blended family, I can have more kids...without the birthing plans and labor pains. I LOVE the idea...and I know without a doubt that any child of my husband will be loved as one of my own...because it's a piece of him.
"You date suits" my guy friend once told me when asked to describe my type. And although my heart has skipped a beat or two to a bad boy in my day...they were much more corporate thug or suburban thug, than county prison thug. My friend was irrefutably on point. Aside from a tall, masculine man with a great smile...a good suit has potential to render me speechless.
So aesthetically, I've revised my prototype. I still need a suit in my life. Still six feet or taller with a smile not hidden behind a deceptive scowl. But deeeefinitely 6-10 years older than me. 4 shakes of pepper, 1-2 shakes of salt. Preferably divorced once (I'll pass on the repeat offenders), with children. I'm so sincere about wanting to be a step mom! I know this may sound odd, but if I've learned anything about myself in this year of revelation and introspection, I've learned that I need a dependable, family oriented man that is stable, secure and sure. Sure of himself, and sure about what he wants. Nothing against my twenty something/early thirties guys, still living on the edge, going hard in the club over the weekend, waiting for the perfect 10 to drop out of the sky and miraculously erase their desire for anyone but her...but I'm not that chick. I don't pretend to be nor do I want to be that chick. I'm not perfect, but I AM amazing. And I think most men need until about 36 to realize that beautiful, loyal, amazing, loving, intelligent and imperfect may just be the perfect combination after all.
The newest prospect (courtesy of Match) has be by 10 years. He is all of the above and lives locally. Trust that I'll keep you posted as I conduct this little social experiment. Not sure of his salt and pepper ratio just yet, but I'm all the way seduced. Stay tuned...
Sidebar: Ladies, if you're a hands person and buy into the myth...please take a look at those little people hands that belong to Denzel!! *Gasp* TRAGEDY! But see!?!? There is always a design flaw. You gotta be leery of super fine. Because either they're stupid or...well, like Denzel...you know.
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